A Mattress, $22k, and A Liberating Truth
Why Manifesting Often Fails — And the Identity Shift That Makes It Work
Photo by Sergey Shmidt on Unsplash
For five weeks, my neighbor’s old mattress festered on her lawn.
It became the backdrop to my life. I’d see it while taking out the trash — a sodden, decaying monument to… something.
Irresponsibility? Laziness?
I (Sophia) didn’t know, but I knew I was judging it. I’d feel a pang of irritation when I saw the neighborhood kids jumping on it, a potential health hazard. I’d sigh, thinking, “Why doesn’t she just deal with it?”
My frustration grew with each passing day. I was stuck in a story I hated, and I’d cast my neighbor as the villain.
Then, while immersed in Neville Goddard’s influential book The Power of Awareness (affiliate link to book), a sentence stopped me cold:
“This great discovery of cause reveals that good or bad, man is actually the arbiter of his own fate… and that it is his concept of himself that determines the world in which he lives.”
Arbiter of my own fate. The words landed not as an empowering affirmation, but as a confronting truth. If I was the arbiter, the cause, then this mattress wasn’t just happening to me. My reality was mirroring something back to me.
I looked around my own apartment. And there it was: in the cupboard, four dusty paper bags filled with old college memorabilia and clutter from three moves ago. Ignored. Unattended. A mess I was refusing to deal with.
The parallel was undeniable. The neighbor’s junk outside my apartment was a perfect reflection of my clutter inside.
The old me would have either not done anything and continued to brood in her anger or, eventually, marched over and asked her, with barely concealed annoyance, to handle her mess.
That would be trying to rearrange the furniture in a burning house.
The new me, the one tentatively embracing this “arbiter” idea, knew the only door was inside my own mind.
I didn’t just clean the clutter. I became a person who lives in a clean, orderly, and attended-to environment. I handled my bags. I sorted, I discarded, I created space. I wasn’t just cleaning; I was embodying a new concept of myself: I am the kind of person who resolves things promptly.
The next day, the mattress was gone.
Now, you might call it a coincidence. But after five weeks of stagnation, the timing was… interesting. It was my first tiny, tangible proof. The universe wasn’t punishing me; it was showing me how the mechanism works.
This lesson became crucial when I started applying these principles to my business. I learned to manifest money, but I hadn’t yet learned to manifest a state of being.
I once visualized and “manifested” a $22,000 month. And it worked! The money came in. But the how was a nightmare. The projects attached to that income required three grueling months of non-stop, high-stress work to deliver. I got the number, but I lost my peace. I got the what, but not the who. I was still the identity of someone who hustles and struggles for abundance.
I was using the law of assumption to change the scenery, but I was still the same anxious character in the play.
Neville Goddard and the Buddha, in their own languages, point to the same solution:
Stop trying to change the reflection. Change the face in the mirror.
This is the shift from manifestation to Identity Shifting.
It’s the difference between:
Manifesting a specific income and becoming the person who is in harmonious financial flow.
Visualizing a perfect partner and embodying the state of being already loved and understood.
Affirming “I am abundant” and feeling the natural, quiet joy of the wish fulfilled.
This is where Neville’s “State of the Wish Fulfilled” meets the Buddha’s Brahmaviharas — the divine abodes of loving-kindness, compassion, joy, and equanimity. These aren’t complicated rituals. They are mind-states. When you dwell in the feeling of love, compassion, or peace, you are, by definition, not dwelling in lack, fear, or frustration. The light naturally drowns out the darkness.
You are assuming a new identity.
The One Practice to Start With Today
This might sound like a massive undertaking. It’s not. It’s a practice, like learning the piano. Every minute counts. Every note matters.
Don’t try to track and purify every “bad karma” seed at once. You’ll exhaust yourself.
Start here: Anchor yourself in a single, wholesome mind-state for five minutes a day.
Sit quietly. Close your eyes.
Choose one: Loving-kindness (May I be happy. May I be safe. May I be healthy. May I live with ease.) or simply the feeling of deep, quiet peace.
Feel it. Don’t just say the words. Generate the sensation in your chest. Let it warm you. Imagine your wish is already fulfilled — not as a frantic craving, but as a present-moment reality. What does that feel like? That’s your new state.
Dwell there. For five minutes, that feeling is your entire world. You are not someone wanting peace; you are peace.
In this state, you are naturally purifying old seeds and sowing new, powerful ones. You are shifting your identity from the inside out. From this place, action becomes inspired, aligned, and effortless — whether it’s cleaning your clutter or building a business.
The world doesn’t change when you chase a different reflection. It changes when you have the courage to become the person for whom that reflection is natural. You are the arbiter. And that is the most liberating truth you will ever embrace.
Ready to fully embody your new identity?
This is the work we do every day in our free Skool community, Shift Your Identity (SYI). It’s a space where we move beyond theory and into practice, supporting each other as we consciously choose and become the people we are meant to be.
If you’re ready to stop hustling against the current and start flowing with it, we’d be honored to have you.